Pride or Prejudice

Today there was an interesting discussion on our yahoo group re: attention multi cultural families get when adopting. But someone left this link and I had to share it. We usually read the posts about what people ask such as "is she adopted" and stuff like that. This article is more about exotic beauty which I never thought of much but found it just so interesting. Especially from a child's eye. We are thinking we are complimenting the parents but... Here it is, 3 pages long but worth reading Pride or Prejudice

Having a Daughter with Autism

I had this entry below on my old blog, Jan 16, 2008, and I thought I would bring it back on this blog since I have shared this blog with other adoptive families from my new agency. I often post about Danica in college and stuff but our Anastasia is 21 and has Autism and a bunch of other diagnosis I don't care to mention right now. She still lives with us. Anastasia is very special to me. In her mind she is about 5 y/o. She talks but it is basic communication. She doesn't have the ability to communicate back and forth with one. She is very attached to me and pretty much follows me everywhere I go. A few weeks ago, we had to take her to the emergency room with a full blown seizure and it was such a horrible experience. The last seizure she had was 5 years ago and it was as bad. Talking about your child dying right in front of you. At least that is what it looks like. She has been such a sweetheart lately and I love her dearly. She truly is my biggest baby and we are soon celebrating her 22nd birthday.

Here is the post 1/16/08:
Today our daughter Anastasia came home from a short term respite stay. I should have taken a before and after picture. Not having ANY family around since we have been married can be hard at times to be alone. Everything Kevin and I do we have to plan, that includes going to a bible study. So when these respite hours come up, Kevin and I get excited to have the alone time but at the same token we are so afraid to let her go because it's always the same when she comes home. Ana smelled bad, grease was coming out of her ears, drool on her face, and HONESTLY it took me 2 hours to comb her hair when finally the knots were all combed out. I don't think they touched her hair once. Reality sat in today after my baby came home and we figured there is no way we could ever let her go into a group home. People just don't take care of other people unless it's their own family, especially special needs children. Thank you God for the healthy body you have given me to take care of my daughter. I think that is another reason why my passion for third world countries grows deeper and deeper every day because people don't have hardly anything but they take care of each other.

Photos and Emails I live by.....

I run to my mail box. I run to the computer the evenings after work just to see if someone wrote me a note, some pics, or just news about anything. And it doesn't help anything that I am not to busy these days because my kids are all grown. I think I am speaking for many adoptive parents that when we get a photo or a special note on our children it makes us jump up and down and so happy. A few days ago I got a picture of my little girl and today I got another note from a lady that was kind enough to write me back after I assured her the B the boy she met was my son. And here is what she said:

I've been meaning to write to you that your B is the B I met. He is a sparkplug. He reminds me of my son Patrick. We have a saying in our family that Patrick is always Patrick. It means that the little boy who drives you crazy by climbing like a monkey on your staircase is the same little boy who gives you kisses and cuddles. I think B will be like that. 100% boy, so energy and activity and sweetness all rolled in to one special kid.
I liked B a lot and the nuns at KM do a great job.

And it makes you feel even better when someone tells you that the orphanage is doing a great job. It's seems like the waiting is getting harder and harder and I find myself so often just missing them like crazy. I wish so much I had some extra money and vacation so I could take a quick flight to ET to visit them.

New Picture of H

Today I received a precious picture of my daughter. She looks really healthy. I am just amazed by how much she has grown in the last 6 months since she came to the orphanage. She sure has that spunky look all over her face. I just love her to pieces. This is one thing about the agency that I have never experienced before. They really care. We get pictures about 1x per month. And to me that is what keeps me going every day while I am waiting.

Next thing I am waiting for is that my file will get to ET. It has been mailed to DC on 5/30 so I am hoping to hear by next week that my file is on the way to ET.

25th Anniversary of my Agency

Today we went driving to Port Angeles to meet the staff from our agency. They are all so nice. It was such a pleasure to meet each of them in person. The only one I didn't get to meet or see was Yvette but she might have been there and I just missed her. I am still surprised by how few people work there and how many families they process each year. Plus they just opened up 2 more programs, one in Bulgaria and one in Burkina Faso (next to Ghana). It was really cute because after I introduced myself to all of them they all knew me just because I had a little rough beginning with ALL of them. Oh except for Ky I have never talked to because she does the China program. The other picture is just a picture I took of the scenery. It's a beautiful drive there. Danica stayed home with her sister and watched her.

Another Special Note

This time I have gotten a very nice email from someone who has been at her orphanage back in March and that is what she had to say:

I don't post much on the yahoo forum, but I wanted to offer you my congrats. My girls also were at KM and I was there to bring them home in March. Your H is the one child out of all the children we met/saw there who really stood out to me. She seems like such an amazing kid - I just fell in love with her! She was all alone in the infirmary room with the worst case of nasty, bleeding chicken pox I have ever seen, but as we walked by she was standing in the crib and yelled my daughter's name excitedly. We went in to see her and they were all smiley and clearly fond of each other. She was beautiful and radiant and spite of the pox - which just really struck me considering where she was and how yucky she must have been feeling.

This is a beautiful note that I will keep in my daughter's lifebook forever so she can remember how special she was to other people. This is how we are surviving by getting pictures and notes from each other. When I go and get my children, I will try to visit all the orphanages and bless many parents to bring them back letters and pictures of their kids. I have more time to spend in ET anyway so I better put it to good use.

More Danica Pictures

Danica's Cheer Team (she is in the middle)

Danica on the left

Danica on the left

Danica and Carissa below. They just got ready for their Ashton Ball. It was a ball just for her dorm.

Yes, my Danica (below on right) colored her hair black. Her natural color is brown. She has always wanted black hair and she loves her color.

Danica is Home from College

Danica is on the left in these 2 pictures. She just came home from college last Wednesday and will be home until the end of September. Those pics were just taken not too long ago at her dorm in Seattle.

Crazy Danica is on the right in the recycle bin. This was candid.

My Danica is a big goofball. She is on the right again on the above pic. She has always been very athletic from soccer, to ice skating, to gymnastics, cheerleading, dance. As you can see, she gets her friends going too. I love her free spirit.

We are Official on Paper

Today I returned my placement agreements to the office along with the welcome bags. Awwwhhh. What a relief. It was very emotional for me to take the packet to the post office. The kids are ours. This piece of paper makes it really official. I got everything what they had on my kids from the office, like their file. Medical reports, test, and pics. They had a lot on my boy and not too much on my girl because he has been there a year now and my girl has been there since January 2008.

B.... has gained some good weight and he also grew. He had his exam just last month, May. He is 4 years and 9 mo old. I haven't gotten any updated exam on H. Her last exam was in January when she was turned in by her mother. Hopefully as families go to pick up children maybe they can give me an idea how tall she is.

I also got another video of waiting kids today that I didn't know existed and both of my kids are singing the ABC. I had heard from other parents that they have seen them on that video; so I had to order it. They looked so happy and adorable. The DVD I have they didn't talk. They just smile. So it is such a delight to watch them again.

Everything feels so real now.

I couldn't resist

I found this precious dress that I just had to have. I love bright colors. I think bright colors show happiness and confidence. I just pictured my little H. in it looking beautiful like a rainbow.

Sweet Messages regarding my Kids

We had to form a signature line on our yahoo group thing stating who we are and who we are adopting every time we leave a message. I guess it became too confusing for people to figure out who is who. Since my message block had my kids' names and orphanage, I got a bunch of emails finding out my kids are very loved and favored. Here are some of the messages... My heart just beats and beats for these kids. What is even more funny I feel like B and H belong to each other like they sibs but really I don't know. I just can feel it. Here we go:

I have a tiny story about him. When I visited K..... in April, we were talking to the nuns and a little head kept popping up over the second story window. I looked over nad there was B...., jumping as fast as could so that he could get a glimpse of the new people. He was so sweet and social and a big talker. Congratulations!

We brought home 4 year old Addisalem from K...... in March and she talks lots about her little friends from there and your kids' names top her list, especially B.....

I LOVE your H ! We seriously considered bringing her home too but the Lord said she wasn't ours. I am thrilled she has a family!

I was wondering who was adopting B..... He's such a cutie. The night we first sat down to "choose" the child we were adopting we started talking about B.... but we quickly received an email from Erin saying, "Wait! B.... has a family as of tonight!" It was really funny.

Dossier Mailed to Washington DC

Today I found out from the office that my dossier papers were actually mailed last Friday, May 30. So even I don't have my placement papers or my new homestudy in my hands, that is a huge step.