Danica off to College again

My Danica. Sorry, the picture is a year old

Where did the 3 months go when Danica was home from college. I am so proud of her. She worked hard all summer long to make some extra cash. I actually had her living on a $100.00 per month while at college last year. But I guess she started to like her financial independence and now she even found a job at her college working at the financial department.

I look back now, a year ago, and she has had so much confusion if she was at the right college. Her story from last year was pretty amazing to tell. She had applied at 4 colleges and they all accepted her. Of course she applied only at an hour radius from our house. She loves being close to home. But she really wanted to chose between either the University of WA or Seattle Pacific University. For me it wasn't even a decision, I wanted her at SPU because I wanted her at a Christian College with low student numbers attending. But I wanted Danica to make her final choice. So last year when it came to decision making between the two colleges I told her she needed to go away and pray about it hard. So she proceeded to go the the beach and here is her story. She told me she prayed and prayed that God would lead her the way. Finally she said "God, if in the next 3 minutes a sea lion comes out of the water, I am meant to go to SPU. If nothing happens, I am meant to go to UWA. So basically the sea lion popped out of the water as soon as she turned her head and here was the decision where she needed to go. I still get chills when I think about Danica's story.

So her first half year at college she was really struggling, not in school but more with the people thinking she didn't fit in because of her being a minority. But a miracle happened after January of this year. She returned from her break and now she loves her college with all the people and everything it has to offer.

Since Kevin is a full time student we actually had to tell the school that we wouldn't be able to bring her back this year because it's private and way too expensive. So they re-locked at our finances and also on how much money we have been spending for the adoptions and they had great mercy on us cutting our bill in half for tuition this coming year. Praise God! That was a great blessing. Now I really believe with all my heart Danica is at the right college where she needs to be and is meant to be.

More about my Danica another day. I just got off in lalaland because I was thinking about her college.

28 days till Court

Every time I think about that I get sick to my stomach. 28 more days or 4 more weeks. We have almost made it. Well let's hope so anyway. I have seen too many stories about people not making court but it just has to happen. Having 2 children that are not related doesn't make it any easier because they have to hear 2 different cases. Although the time was flying by, it still seems so slow and forever away. I just miss these little ones so badly. I dream about them so much. I dream of holding them both in my arms for the very first time. I really hope that ones they have made court that the time flies by after that just because of packing and doing all these last minute things. The fact that I am traveling alone doesn't bother me at all. I just wanna be with my kids. I wish I could leave right now and I so would if I didn't have to work right now.

Any Suggestions?

This weekend we are moving our 20 year old Danica into the basement. Don't worry it's nice, its a daylight basement and she is really excited anyway. Plus she is going back to college soon. She will not be home very often but of course we feel like we still need to give her a room. And I like to keep all my little ones upstairs with me.

Anyway, I really need your advice. If you are reading my blog and have never left a comment, I would appreciate your advice too if you can relate to my question. My 2 kids from ET are a boy and a girl, both 4 years old, and I will have to put them in one room. Although I am not buying any furniture yet I was trying to get some ideas. The room is already painted yellow which I think is a neutral color. I was so set on getting a girly room and a boyish room but since I have to now set them up in one room I don't know what to do. I have to say I am a little disappointed. I know the kids really don't care but I do. I just want to set up something fun and inexpensive.

What would I do? What would you do?

My two very 2 sweet blogger friends Carolyn and Andrea have recently picked up their children from ET. I didn't get there permission to link their blog but I will just have to say something about them.... Before picking up their children they had to make some serious decisions if they still wanted to bring their children home or not per the agency. Without even blinking (I know they prayed and talked to their husband's about it) they made the decision to bring home those precious children anyway, no matter what. Just writing about this is making tears stream down my face. I have so much love and respect for these families I can't barely explain! They have just inspired me so much in my own journey. Having followed their blogs and watched the grace they have and love for their children is an understatement.

I am saying all of this because I am telling you that God has prepared me also to bring my two precious children home no matter what is wrong with them. Do you hear? No matter what. The day I signed the placement papers, those precious children were my children just like my 2 bio children. I will love them unconditionally. Even if they were healthy and have some deep anger issues, want to destroy my house, or beat me, whatever it is, bring it one, I am prepared. Once I have made a commitment that is it, through thick and thin. I will make this vow to my children today at this very moment.

CAMP

I had the privilege this weekend to meet some amazing families that have already brought their children home from ET. Since they have not given me permission or I rather didn't even ask to post their pictures, I will not.

The kids were off playing with their counselor's pretty much all day and the parents got to have free time most of the camp. But for me the best time was I got to talk to the wonderful women that I was able to meet just on their blogs.

My husband and another husband was just cracking up over me as I mentioned all their names and they just looked at me like I was crazy.

What was really the biggest highlight was that Kevin got to talk to some dads that he just admired and was able to get their side of the story on adoption and large families. He is really, really excited now.

If any of the ladies that I met at camp are reading this that I have met up with, I just have to tell you, you are so amazing and incredible and I wished we all lived closer together.

And one last thing, there was one kid that I absolutely adored. She was really good friends with my son B in ET and we just hit it off. Ask her mommy, right S.? I picture my little girl H. looking just like her frame wise.

Happy Anniversary - 23 years

Here is my story. I love reading on other blogs how a couple met or they write devotions for their husband or wives. Scroll down to next post to see pics. You know I am not a good writer but here is mine:

I met Kevin back in 1984. My best friend than was dating his best friend. So Kevin asked his friend to meet one of his girlfriend’s friends, which was me of course.

The first night I met him I just got in from a tennis match and I was all sweaty, gross but at least our meeting wasn't all having me made up. So we became really good friends and had a great friendship for six months. I really liked him as a friend but something didn’t click for me as it had for Kevin from the very beginning. I guess I wasn’t attracted to him but I LOVED his personality. (hey at least I am being honest). I think my mother-in-law would kill me if she reads this since she thinks her son is the best since gravy.

The real awakening didn’t come for me until I went to Greece with 6 girlfriends and while I was at the island of Crete, a voice told me (back then I didn’t believe in God, but I know now it was God) in the middle of the night while sitting at the ocean, “Kevin is it, he will be your husband".
After I returned from Greece, I told Kevin I wanted to date him and I am very serious now. After that we became inseparable and spent every free moment we had together.
In November of 1984 he told me he had to go back to the states and I was just devastated. I said “yeah right, a military guy, there is no way we are going to get married now and last forever. But Kevin assured me that he loved me and even though he has to go back to the states he will not leave me behind. I still didn’t believe him.

We got engaged on March 31, 1985 and he went back to the states in May of 1985. I came to visit him in August that year and we got married while I was visiting. Yeah there you go, “no wedding, just the courthouse”. Hopefully one day, we can renew our vows and have a real wedding as this has always been my dream.

Obviously we were only 20 when we got married and for us to jump in there without leading a marriage and not putting God first, that is pretty much bound for failure. But at least we had very old fashioned values and I think that is what kept us going year after year. It sure wasn’t easy the first 10 years. Ughh I wanted to kill him so many times and so did he. We had many Kool-Aid and food fights to let our aggressions out.

But thanks to God’s grace, today our marriage is just so awesome and growing deeper every day. I thank God every day for giving me Kevin. He is the sweetest, most loving, funniest, sexiest, handsome man on this earth in my eyes. But you know what I love about him the most is that he is sad when I am sad. He says nothing makes him happier when I smile, ha-ha I guess he likes my smile. So he has supported me 100% in this adoption journey for going on over 2 years. He keeps handing out more and more money every day to pay for these adoptions but he keeps saying “I love to see that smile when you talk about the children we are going to adopt”. Yeah I just love this man like crazy and I am so thankful for him. He brings sooooo much joy to my life.

23 years! Happy Anniversary Kevin

Kevin and I dating, 1984 (19y/o), wow that is Danica's age!

March 31, 1985 (We got engaged)

Kevin returns from Desert Storm/Saudi Arabia 1991

2001 Our annual recruiting ball

The picture on my blog to the right was taken this year so you guys know what we look like now, this year. Didn't have time to go through all my other pics, but better than nothing. Oh and thanks to my precious daughter Danica for scanning these pics today. No time to do it myself.

What is wrong with me?

This wait is really driving me crazy. I know I should be patient but ...... I check emails and blogs especially the ones where children are coming home obsessively.

The wait has become increasingly painful. I can't do nothing anymore. I can't do my devotional time without getting distracted, I can't do my work flawless like I normally do, I can't even prepare a meal without something getting burned. I am CONSTANTLY distracted by thinking of my children.

The pictures I have received have been awesome but I just want to get my children. Although time really seems to fly but suddenly time stands still again.

I know once my kids have passed court, I have no doubt that the time to pick them up will be here in a heartbeat. I am not getting the room set up at all until they pass court. I have bought some clothes and stuff but I will not buy any furniture just yet.

I just want to hold my precious children and protect and love them forever and ever. There seems to be one good thing though. I think they really like each other even though they are not sibs. Pretty much every group picture I see my girly is right there with her brother.

Okay, enough whining, tomorrow will be a better day, yeah right! One more thing...I am so blessed to have a husband to puts up with my strange behaviors right now.

8 Weeks Today until Court

In 2 Months From Today

, we will have a court date for my children. I miss them like crazy. Sometimes I am amazed how fast the weeks fly by but then I look at 2 more months and it seems like a long time. I really hope it will be here in no time.

Hah, and I just looked at my timeline above and it has been four months since we started the adoption. So the 15th must be a special day. Oh boy, I guess I am just talking.... I don't have a life (right now).

My Carolyn

Have you been visiting Carolyn's blog lately? I just have grown so much love, passion, respect, and even more so wanting to chase after my God more and more every day and taste him the way Carolyn has especially in these last 2 months almost. I just love this family so much, especially Carolyn and Selah. If you are having a hard time or you need to be inspired, please visit her blog.

Homeschooling in Germany

I found this article link on another blog and I was utterly disturbed and ashamed that this could happen in Germany, the country I was born and raised. It looks pretty communistic to me (but the government is not). How can the system put the children in foster care and give them psychiatric interviews to make sure they are okay? I am shocked they went to this extreme. I have been a huge supporter of homeschooling thanks once again to my friend Joy for making me read a book by Voddie Buchanan, Above Rubies, and also her 24 reasons why she homeschools. I am still shaking my head over this. But I really shouldn't because I know when my day comes and I get to stay home and can homeschool my children, my family in Germany will think I have lost my mind. Oh well, they don't put food on my table, my husband and I do. Don't get me wrong, I love my extended family dearly, but we are thousands miles apart on opinions. Let's just leave it at that. I am not even getting into the adoption part difference of opinions. I am going to leave that for another day.

Angelina Jolie

Kevin and I had a heated discussion last night how People magazine paid 14 million to get Angie's new baby pictures. I have to say my worldly thinking has long ago left my soul and I don't worship worldly people or any kind of people anymore except for my God. I was proud of Angelina for doing that. I am absolutely impressed how she has the magazines all wrapped around her fingers that they would pay her that much. I guess the main reason for this post is that I do love the fact that she will give back 100% of the 14 million that she is receiving to the countries she loves and support so much where she has adopted from. There is no way once we adopt from a certain country that my heart wouldn't be there knowing my children came from there. Kevin just couldn't get over himself how they would pay so much money for pictures. Well obviously that tells you what kind of land we are living in where people magazine knows that they can pay that much knowing people will run and buy that magazine and they know they will get every penny back they paid to Angie.

Double Good News (Court & Welcome Bags)

Today was a crazy day because Miss Erin emailed me 2 x at work and I had a hard time containing myself. First I got a picture of the kids receiving their welcome bag. Oh it was so precious to look at. They were wearing their t-shirt but they had the biggest smiles on their face. You so could tell how happy they were to have received the bag and that THEY KNOW FOR SURE NOW.

Second, I was notified that court date is October 15. You can check my ticker to the right, I have already set it up. Okay I was two days off. I thought it was October 17. It's really nice to finally make the court date official.

Court Date? and "Firsts"

Today was a glorious day. It was the very first time that I have received a photo of my precious children "together" and a photo period that was taken by a parent. I have some pics from Snapfish but they were never taken intentionally. I asked the parent if she could take a photo of them together. Although they are not siblings, it is unbelievable how much they look like siblings. I seriously couldn't stop crying. It was such a precious moment for me to see them together. I immediately ordered a 5x7 and counting down the time to pick up the picture from the store. In fact I will pick it up as soon as I have written this post. My Carolyn has hopefully returned with Yordi and she has taken a photo of my kids also. Once she is settled in a few weeks I will probably get a photo from her and Lisa is over there picking up her daughter and her blog has said that she has already made it to KM. This is beautiful to have finally connected with families that are taking photos of my children.

I also read on our yahoo group that the group before us has been assigned court for October 11. Really I am sure there is a typo because that is a Saturday so I would assume it would probably October 10, which is a Friday. That means my group will be assigned for October 17. Please note that this is just a guessing game and I gave not gotten an email from the agency but so far I have been right on by my calculations even down to court by just watching the blogs and groups. So that means I can have high hopes to have my children home right before Christmas IF they pass court. Remember my kids are not sibs so they will be heard as 2 different cases.