Adoption Journey Continued - Zambia

This is the day I asked B if he wanted to come live with us.

This is the day B came to stay with me at the hotel

At B's orphanage

As people are reading my blog and really don't know my adoption story, I wanted to share today my 2nd attempt.

On Thursday, July 24, when I announced the court submissions for my kids came a bittersweet memory of last year. On July 24, 2007, I met B. in Zambia. After my failed adoption in Guatemala, I felt that it was pretty much a year since Juan A. and now had the urge coming on that we needed to try again. I embarked on this last minute journey with an agency promising us to get a child if we had our homestudy ready. Of course I did.

When we got to Zambia, some of us got our children within a week of being there. But towards the end we found out from the high minister herself that adoptions aren't really open to foreigners which means we were mislead by the agency. My agency then probably did not do enough research to know that we weren't doing the right thing and just went on using the families that went before us as an example. To those who read this blog and know of my journey, this is not to intent to bash the agency I went with so please don’t leave anything negative about them. I will delete it immediately. It is purely to talk about my journey.

Today, almost returning a year since then, the Zambians have opened up adoptions to foreigners but are making it nearly impossible to adopt because they now requiring that you foster the child for 12 months in Zambia. Do you get what they are trying to do? They want to look good and not get too much bad press. And after the 12 months, you are still not guaranteed to bring your kids home.

Almost 2 months ago, my B. has ran away from the orphanage where he was at. The orphanage director where he was at has stated that he was seen in a village where his relatives live. To me that is hard to believe because my boy has been severely beaten by them (all of them) and for him to run to them, that would be hard to believe. B. is really hard to get over because my husband and I have build a relationship over the months of separation where we have been calling him almost every weekend before he ran away. And really I don't think anybody is looking for him. For a 10+ y/o boy to run away that is no big deal like it would be here in the States.

Some might ask, why Zambia? I don't know, I guess I had chosen Zambia a year ago because I was a desperate parent trying to bring a child home. I wished I had done more research, but I didn't. Two years into my journey, I have most definetly done my research on what country is safe to adopt from. We live and learn and have to fall a few times..

Here is B's description from my old blog:

B's parents died when he was about 3 years old. Both of his parents died back to back on HIV positive. I had him tested and he is negative. He then was raised by his 3 uncles but mainly 2 of them making him beg in the streets and if he couldn't bring any money home they would just beat him and beat him. He finally ran away from them and ended up at the orphanage where he has lived for the past 6 years. The great comfort in this adoption journey is that he truly is an orphan. Even his uncles don't have anymore rights to him. They wouldn't anyway because they have a criminal history on beating him. But the oldest brother in the tribe signed away all rights. With everything he has been through he has this wonderful personality. A great sense of humor, intelligent, speaks at least 3 languages. School wise he is pretty behind since all the children attend the same class room but I have no doubt that eventually he will catch on.